What do you think your goals will really bring you?
Do you ever find yourself going after a goal or maybe even hitting the goal and still feeling empty inside?
Like you achieve it and it doesn't feel like enough. Then all of the sudden your feelings of worth become a moving target and you never quite get to that place of fulfillment, that place of joy.
One of the three greatest challenges that I see entrepreneurs make on the path to their biggest dreams is not knowing how to enjoy the ride and actually appreciate the journey.
In fact this makes them never get their biggest goals and dreams.
Any time they achieve something it doesn't feel like enough.
I’ve studied thousands of entrepreneurs over the years and I’ve discovered something really powerful about what makes people actually thrive.
What I found in the wildly successful people that I’ve worked with is that every single one of them is truly fulfilled on the path to their dreams instead of thinking that their dreams will make him feel fulfilled.
That is one of the most significant differences of successful entrepreneurs versus unsuccessful entrepreneurs.
This is the third piece our three-part series of Speeding Up Success. We talked about a massive vision, massive goals. We also talked about being honest about where you are.
Now that we are honest about where we are and we know where we’re going, now it’s about how to get there faster, how to speed that up.
I want to start my little recap of what we talked about this three-part series so far.
Part 1: We talked about the speed of success, we need a vision bigger than we ever dreamed.
We need to be excited about where we're going.
Something that compels us, that moves us because without a compelling future we’re automatically going to focus on the problems of the present.
So we need something massive that pulls us. That's exciting. That we actually want.
If we’re not hitting out goals, then it’s because they’re not big enough. They’re not something that actually moves us to get there.
Part 2: We need to be honest about where we’re actually at because we make up stories about where we’re at. Then we actually think we’re further back from where we are and we have all this mental cloudiness, we can't think clearly to get to where we want to go.
This third piece, if we’re following that same GPS metaphor – we had that exciting destination, we're honest about where we are, this third piece is about how to get there faster.
I've seen entrepreneurs for years always post consistently about how it's all about the journey but then that same day they're stressed out.
The same day they're sitting there and posting because they had to come up with the social media post that day and they just feel exhausted and tired and overwhelmed.
What this leads to is an entrepreneur that is always on. Do, do, do, do, do, can never turn off.
I want you to ask yourself if you've ever felt that double guilt.
Guilt when you're working cause you're not with your family or with your friends. Or guilt when you're with your friends or with your family cause you're not working.
You feel like if you stop, everything will fall apart.
Like everything is held together by a little thread and you can't turn it off.
That is the consequence of attachment.
That is the consequence of you believing that your goals make you something.
It's you making yourself something that creates the goals.
So this episode is all about attachment and letting go of that feeling of your worth being somehow tied to an outcome.
The reason that this is so important is because once you realize you’re not tied to an outcome, then all of a sudden you take more risks. You do more things. You’re more creative. So you actually create the big dreams and the big goals.
We need to break this feeling of attachment, this feeling of I am my results.
If you believe you are your results then what that means is no matter what result you get, if you don't get a sale that day you're going to feel crappy, then if you get a sale that day then you are going to feel electric and amazing.
Your emotions are up and down all the time cause you're worth is based on what you complete instead of who you are.
That's not fair to you.
If you're worth is based on what you complete instead of who you are, think about the consequences of that.
What are the consequences of thinking “I am my results”.
You're always exhausted, you’re always overwhelmed.
There’s a piece of you that knows you’re meant for more but you're not actually getting it.
And you’re just always, always, always stressed.
You're always overwhelmed. You’re not enjoying the beauties of your life. You’re not taking up the moments to soak up a hug with your kids or to spend a couple extra moments with your husband or wife cause you're too exhausted. You’re too stressed. You're thinking that everything around you needs to go the way that you want in order for you to feel something.
That's not how success works.
That’s breaking the laws of success.
If you think that somehow achieving something or completing something or getting done with your to-do list is actually going to make you feel something, than what you'll find is that you'll complete a list and ask yourself where is the fulfillment, where is the joy?
So you'll make yourself a harder to do list to show you can overcome more and then all of a sudden you'll be even more exhausted.
And it’s do, do, do, do all the time. Can’t turn off. And overwhelmed.
What that does is it lowers your energy, it causes you to constrict. And when you constrict, when you're protecting yourself cause you think you're worth is somehow tied to an outcome, so you always need to be perfect, you always need to be on, then what ends up happening?
There's no energy. There's no creativity or liveness to give your biggest goals and your biggest dreams.
You just feel exhausted 24/7 and so there's no new ideas.
You try the same old thing over and over and over again thinking that somehow it’s magically going to work.
And then when it doesn't work, you make up stories.
You say, well it must be easier for them. They don’t understand my situation. My situation is harder.
But if you think about it, when you shift this and you realize I'm worthy either way, I’ve always been worthy, I’ll always be worthy. No matter what happens in my business or my life or my finances – I am enough as is.
Aren't you more likely to do the things that will create the big dream?
You're going to put yourself out there in a new way you never put yourself out there before.
You’ll try different things. You'll feel more alive, so you'll have more challenging conversations, you'll reach out to the better prospects, you’ll do all these incredible things that will lead to a beautiful life.
The byproduct of living this way, of a place of detachment, is where all of a sudden success starts flying to you.
Your goals and your dreams seemed to happen faster. It almost seems effortless, it just kind of happens.
And that sounds BANANAS.
I used to look at stuff like that and be like no, that can't happen. Until I lived it!
Once I lived it, I realized this is real. This is the laws of success.
We want to get to a state of detachment.
Detachment is not that you should own nothing, it’s that nothing should own you.
That is a beautiful place. When you can live in that place, all of a sudden you start moving. You start doing different things because you realize that no matter what the outcome, I am still enough as.
I'm still enough who I am on the inside and that's plenty.
I've always been enough, I’ll always be enough, I am enough right now.
So if we go back to the Success GPS metaphor that we've been using the last couple of weeks and we think about Part 1 as the destination. Having a compelling destination that it's worth driving across the country for. And if you set your for the current amount of gas you have in the tank, then you’re going to turn around and go home. You’re not going to be excited about where you’re going.
This is why goals seem to evade us.
In Part 2, we talked about being honest about your current situation. Where you're currently at.
Your GPS right now, not making up stories that it's better than it is, not making up a story that's worse than this this is. Just being objective, this is my starting point. This is my bank balance. This is my business size. Your objective starting point.
Then when you go from where you are to where you want to be, then all of a sudden you have something called a drive. A drive from where you are to where you want to be.
If we're charting a course from where we are to where we want to be, think of it like you're driving a car, you have your current location and you have your amazing destination. When you start driving, if I'm in Chicago and I want to drive to Yosemite National Park, when I first start that drive there's some traffic.
It's bumper to bumper, it's moving slower than I want to go.
Most people think it should be 90 miles an hour one way to get to where they want to go, but in the beginning there seems to be bumper to bumper traffic.
There’s stop lights and stop signs and left turns and right turns, but when you get to the freeway and you start to merge and you think it's going to be this big acceleration when all of a sudden you go to one of those stop lights at the freeway. And then you finally go and you floor it but then you realize you get on the freeway but it’s all bumper to bumper traffic.
That's what it's like starting your dreams.
You're driving down this road but you need to honor that speed because if you go 70 when everyone else is going 10, you're going to hit someone.
And if you go 10 when everyone else is going 70, then you’re going to end up causing an accident.
We need to honor the speed limits of life.
We need to notice that this is the speed that I'm going out and that's okay. I'm learning something right now. And then you're going to start to get out of town and that speed is going to increase even more.
You start gaining momentum and gaining traction in your business, but you notice that your gas tank is a little bit low. And you also are noticing that your start to get hungry and need to go to the bathroom.
What most people do when they’re on the path of where they are where they want to be is they don't want to stop to pee. I don’t want to slow down at all. I need to be going full force.
I did this once.
I did this on my drive from Chicago to Dallas. I thought that I could save 2 hours by buying a portable urinal and peeing into the urinal and pouring it out the window while I was driving.
How do you think that went?
I peed on my face.
And this is what most entrepreneurs do. They aren't willing to take a break. They aren’t willing to slow down, recharge their batteries, and have self care because they think they always need to be on. They always need to be going and if they just go go go go go, then we'll get to the destination faster.
But what ends up happening is you end up peeing on your face.
Which makes you stop even longer and clean up.
So when you feel the urge to go to the bathroom, when you feel the urge to stretch your legs, you need to get out of the car on the drive. If you're driving from where you are to where you want to be, rest and recharge is part of the game.
That makes you enjoy the journey even more.
So I want you to ask yourself when is the last time you've intentionally recharged your batteries? Stopped to go to the bathroom or get a bite to eat?
Then you’ll notice that your gas tank is getting a bit low. You start to get a little tired. You need to stop for gas.
Recharging your battery batteries through Mastermind or coaching, your seminars, your group coaching, whatever it is. Recharging your batteries so you have more fuel to drive further.
This destination is so exciting for you that you're willing to fill up your tank multiple times.
You have to fill up your tank by investing in yourself, by getting around people that are playing ball at the next level. That allows you to change and grow faster than ever before.
Then you'll be on this drive and you’ll notice that it’s flat and it's amazing sometimes, you're cruising through the cornfields. And sometimes you get to a mountain range. You notice to go the same speed you were going before, it takes pushing down on that gas pedal a little bit harder than you've been pushing. A little more effort is required.
Then there are times when you get over that hill and you're going on the other side and it doesn't take any effort at all. You can take your foot off the gas and just cruise down that hill.
Then there’s going to be times on this journey when there's different weather. Where it's sunny and you're going for it, but there’s going to be times on this journey when it's raining.
What most entrepreneurs do when it starts drizzling, they pull over. They stop. Oh this is hard, this is a challenge in my life, this is what's going on the world, I'm going to stop right now because the media says all this crap going on.
But do you need to pull over your car if there's a drizzle or light rain? No. The only time to pull over your car is when it’s a downpour, when it's a blizzard.
When there's a downpour, it means something truly significant has happen in your life.
Let’s say you lose a loved one. Is that a time to keep going in your business? It's not a time to go back home, but it is a sign to pull over the car and handle that and then get back on the road. You're not any further back if you take a break and handle the situation. But I don't want you to rationalize that a challenge in your life is actually causing your business to slow down.
When there's actually significant rain or significant snow, that's when you do it and you need to be the judge of that.
Most people use a light rain as the reason to pull over but I'm telling if you want to speed up success, that's where you keep going, when everyone else is pulling over.
Then you're going to be cruising down the road and you'll notice that you're on this four lane super highway and all the sudden those lanes narrow down to one.
It's a construction zone.
All of a sudden it's slow again when you thought it should be fast.
And in those moments you have a choice.
You can either be upset that it's moving slower than you want it to go or you play Taylor Swift.
I recommend play Taylor Swift. Your call.
Most people when that happens, when it's going slower than they thought it should be, they get pissed off. But in those situations if you enjoy and you celebrate and you appreciate it as part of the journey of life, then magic starts happening.
It's beautiful when that happens.
Then you're going to be on this journey and making progress towards your dreams and all the sudden GPS will pop up and say “hey faster route available”.
A new opportunity that you've never tried before.
Something beautiful, something amazing that is a risk, a gamble.
Let me ask you a question….is Google always right?
When you're on Google Maps, isn't it always down to the minute when they said you'd be there?
So you can keep going the way you've always gone or you can trust that Google knows what they're talking about and you can take that road less traveled. You can take a different path than you've known before. You can take that leap of faith into the unknowns and give up what you thought would be.
When you do this, you get to your destination so much faster than everyone else who floors it through a 10 mile an hour bumper to bumper traffic, who doesn’t stop to pee and ends up peeing on their face, who doesn’t fill their gas tank and ends up calling AAA, who gets furious when there's a construction zone, who doesn't take that new route. That’s what slows down success.
But when you're one of those people that is willing take all those pit stops, willing to fill up the tank, willing to go through all the topography, willing to deal with the different weather, willing to go and celebrate during those times when it’s slower than you thought, and willing to take the road less traveled and different routes than you thought you’d be, you speed up success.
But there's one thing that makes all of this even more possible and that's who's in the car with you.
Cause if you have people in your life that are dragging you down and you have dreams of going from Chicago to Yosemite and this amazing hiking trip with these grand visions, but the people in the car with you were saying that hiking sucks, you’re not going to want to go hiking. You’re going to turn around and go home.
And you might say, well what if this is a loved one, a family member, someone I care about?
Buy them a plane ticket. Put them in the truck (I’m not saying put your spouse in the trunk.).
You buy them a plane ticket. You go that distance anyway. You're a visionary, you go first and you show them how beautiful it is.
You need to be with people on that journey that are excited about hiking, otherwise you're going to be exhausted. You’re going to be overwhelmed. You're going to slow down your success.
That is the power of letting go of attachments.
I want you to ask yourself a question: What do you think the end will bring you?
What do you think your goal will bring you?
People say all the time, financial freedom. What does financial freedom get you? You might say peace of mind or security.
What's preventing you from having peace of mind right now? Security right now?
It's not money.
It’s how you’re thinking.
It’s how you’re feeling.
If you take a look at what you think the goal will give you, and you ask yourself, why don’t I have that now? You realize, I could have that.
The very thing you thought that goal will bring you, is available to you today. When you realize that the very thing you thought the goal will bring you is available, then you start picturing and living in the feelings of your wishes and seeing that as real and living in those emotions of being wealthy before financial independence. Then all of a sudden you’re living in that place and all of those tangible results are just a cool little bonus. It’s really about the person that you’re becoming.
That's what we need to rewire. That’s the subconscious mind that we need to shift and change.
When you do that, I promise you, life will never be the same again.
You will succeed faster than ever before, you'll make more money than you've ever made. Life will be very very different very very quickly but it starts with you rewiring your mind.
If you're having a hard time with this, if you would know this conceptually but you haven't really adopted it on the inside, take our What's Your Unique Success Archetype Quiz.
It's free, it takes 60 seconds. It’s changed tens of thousands of lives now, it will change yours too.
If you understand this conceptually but you're not actually living it, like you know that you need to enjoy the ride but you're not actually doing it, you're attached to successes instead of detached, it’s cause of your belief system.
You'll be able to see in that archetype quiz what's slowing you down, what's getting in your way.
When you have that awareness, you can do something to speed it up.
I hope you found tremendous value in this episode today please make sure you screenshot this, share this with some people that you love the most, share with your team so they can grow and change.
I hope this three-part series added value to your life.
We need to dream bigger than we've ever dreamed.
We need to be objective about where we currently are.
And we need to truly be detached and enjoy the ride so we get there faster than ever before.
Remember if you’re having challenges with this take the What’s Your Unique Success Archetype Quiz below.
CONNECT WITH ME
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• Website: https://www.bradbizjack.com/
• Blog: https://www.bradbizjack.com/blog
• Podcast: http://bit.ly/bradspodcast
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