The secret to confidence is WAY simpler than you think.
I was at a Tony Robbins "Unleash The Power Within" conference this past weekend, and I walked across a 2,000-degree bed of coals. I didn’t feel a thing. And I’m willing to guess you’re probably going, “HOW THE HELL DID YOU DO THAT?”
Now obviously there’s a strategy, but in that situation, what would stop most people? FEAR.
What’s the opposite of fear? Confidence.
Confidence can be called like a dog. And if you do it enough times, it’s like exercising a muscle… it’s not something you have to think about. It’s just something that happens.
So Tony Robbins explains something called, “STATE.”
STATE is the source of ALL emotion. STATE is how you go through life. If you’re in a depressed state, will you walk across a fire? No. Will you ask that person out? No. If you’re worried, will you do those things? No. So state is the thing that gives you the certainty to attack life. It’s your emotional state.
How you talk to yourself and the words that you use. I talk about this in my video blog post, “7 Keys To Stay Positive During The Fall Season.”
Wherever focus goes, energy flows. If you focus on what you don’t want, you’ll find it! Make sure to check out my video blog post called, “How To Get Out Of Your Rut When You’re Feeling Stuck – Part 1." – that’s where we’ll go through that.
But when you pair those things with what I’m gonna talk about today, you’ll feel confident in every situation you face.
The third and most important part of state is your physiology. I’m gonna show you that how you use your body makes or breaks the confidence you have.
Physiology is the base of EVERYTHING you want.
So, where does ENERGY come from? Is it food? Is it sleep? NO. It’s a choice. It can be awakened in seconds.
Think of something you want to achieve. You won’t take massive action until you have CERTAINTY, right? All people won’t take massive action until they have certainty.
Even if you WANT to change your life, you won’t until you have certainty.
That takes you from a cognitive understanding of a goal to feeling the goal, emotionally. This is what most people do with their affirmations. But where it builds a sense of certainty is where you say it with physically emotional intensity. Where you say it with your BODY and high EMOTION.
There’s a difference between affirmation and incantation. An affirmation is a statement. An incantation is a statement with so much emotional intensity, it gets wired into who you are!
Your business can be built with learning specific skills, right? You’ll USE those skills the proper way ONLY when you’re in a state of certainty. You’ll only MASTER skills when you’re in a state of confidence.
Fear dissipates when you are in a state of certainty. There’s only 1 small difference between fear and faith.
SO ENERGY IS EVERYTHING.
Reality gets distorted in low energy states. Fear takes over in low energy states. When your energy lowers, your mindset lowers.
Let's use the example of 2 people deeply in love.
2 people, who are genuinely in love with high energy every day will have what type of relationship? A GREAT one!
2 people, deeply in love with average energy have a higher or lower quality of relationship? Exactly! LOWER!
2 people, deeply in love with shitty energy, what is that relationship like? Horrible. Roommates. Boring.
When energy is down, you won’t execute. Period.
So how do you change your energy?
WITH A RADICAL CHANGE in your physiology. Notice what you do with your body. Think of what you would do with your body when you’re in THESE states.
In each of those emotional states, what are you doing with your body?
Is your head up or down? Down.
Are you breathing fast or shallow? Shallow.
Shoulders slouched or pulled back? Slouched.
Chest up or down? Down.
Loud or quiet? Quite.
In a state of CONFIDENCE, what are you doing with your body?
Is your head up or down? Up!
Are you breathing fast or shallow? Fast!
Shoulders slouched or pulled back? Pulled back!
Chest up or down? Up!
Loud or quiet? Loud!
So I’m curious. What are your 2 favorite types of suffering? Is it depression? Anxiety? Fear? Mine are impatience and frustration. What are your two favorite types? Those states are nothing but a PATTERN. That’s it. It’s something you do with your BODY.
The mistake you probably make is thinking that you ARE your patterns. You’re not. You’re just so used to going into those states so often that they’re reinforced.
What things in your life trigger those states? You might what to write that down! What if every time you notice yourself going into that state, you do something radically different with your body? It’s like scratching a record. You can’t play it again if you scratch it enough times. That's what you'll be doing if you do something radically different with your body.
Example of scratching the record: When I have a rapport with a client that’s telling me they’re depressed, I’ll just go, “when is the last time you had an INSANE orgasm?” They're like WHAT?! And I'll tell them to keep saying why they're depressed and they have NO idea! Why?
Because I scratched their record. I interrupted their pattern.
They have no idea why they were even upset!! It’s because emotions are just STATES. That’s it. They’re not YOU.
Depression, anxiety, fear, sadness are STATES. Not something YOU are. Seriously how many of you know people who take antidepressants and are STILL depressed!?! That’s because drugs NUMB the pain but don't get to the core of the issue.
So put yourself into a depressed state with your body right now. Slouched, head and chest down. Breathe shallowly. Now watch this. You can change it by changing your body. Stand up. Do a high knee run (seriously do this) for 30 seconds. I want you to FEEL the difference.
Did you notice your body feels different than it did a minute ago? Feelings can be changed by breaking the pattern of physiology you’re using. So when you see those states coming, interrupt your own pattern. The orgasm example is a way to disrupt my client's pattern with words. You can do the same thing with your body!
Your physiology is everything. Something SO small can make a difference.
I'm not to say that fear will go away. You can’t have courage without fear. But you’ll GO AFTER the fear by adjusting your physiology.
You'll DO what you feel. So, learn how to feel good.
When you realize the POWER of your physiology, you can interrupt any pattern that isn’t total confidence and total certainty.
How alive do you feel at a concert? Why? Because you’re using your entire body. You’re jumping up and down. You’re singing. Different chemicals are released in the brain. So all you have to do to RADICALLY change your confidence is a RADICAL change in your physiology.
When you pair physiology with mastering your LANGUAGE (Reference: 7 Keys To Stay Positive During The Fall Season) and mastering your FOCUS (Reference: How To Get Out Of Your Rut When You're Feeling Stuck - Part 1), GAME OVER.
You’ll win at life, and you’ll be unstoppable.
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