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Everything impacts everything. What does that mean? The area that you likely want to work on isn't the area that you need to work on… and from not working on the area that you really need to work on, you're holding yourself back in the area that you want to work on!
It’s a vicious cycle downward because we use the area that we're already fulfilled in as a distraction from the area that would actually give us fulfillment. But today we’re going to dive into something really powerful; which area of your life should you be focused on right now.
After today, you’ll know where to direct your focus!
Let’s get started by jumping back in time. 10 years ago, I heard something from Tony Robbins. He said,
“There are three skills that you really need in life. Number one is pattern recognition. Number two is pattern utilization. Number three is pattern creation. And if you do those three things, you will succeed at a deep level.”
I've recognized patterns in peoples’ lives from working with over 40,000 people. The most important thing I’ve discovered is that there are three areas—three buckets—in people's lives that they focus on, and they impact everything.
Bucket 1: Wealth
Wealth is a major area in people's lives, but what does wealth mean? In this context, there are three sub segments of the bucket.
Wealth and financial independence are very different things. Wealth is in your psychology, but building your income comes from being wealthy. In fact, income is a byproduct of wealth, not the other way around.
Most people think that wealth is a byproduct of income. They think, “I need to increase my income to become wealthy.” That’s not true. You need to become wealthy and that will increase your income and that will change everything.
Bucket 2: Health
There are three main areas of health.
Your body is a vessel used to deliver your life's purpose to the world. If this machine doesn't have physical vibrancy, then you're not going to be able to deliver in the way that you want.
Taking care of your mindset, your personal development, your mental health—that’s your emotional health. This plays a huge role because if you’re depressed, think of how that impacts your desire to want to take care of your body. It lowers it. But if you’re happy and excited on a regular basis, you want to take care of your body more.
If your body is full of energy, then you're more likely to do things that will help your emotional health.
Your spiritual health is your connection with something bigger. I'm not here to tell you what to believe. Whatever you believe is great. I believe that there is something bigger out there that is guiding me. Call it:
Whatever the name is, it's the exact same thing. My whole point is when you are connected to something bigger you take care of your health in a different way. You have a better outlook on life.
Bucket 3: Relationships
Once again there are three sub segments. The first area of relationships is with yourself. If you don't love yourself, how do you ever expect to give love to your partner in the way that they deserve? You won't, it's not possible. If you aren’t actively working on loving yourself, you’ll find your marriage, parenting, friendships, etc. all impacted.
The second area of relationships is with your intimate partner. If your relationship is off, everything will be wrong in your heart. It will crush your desire to put yourself out to the world and sell more of your product. Also, if you're not in an intimate relationship, it's not because you don't want one.
It's because you've been hurt before, and you think you're going to be hurt again. It's because of your beliefs about relationships. You’ve found significance in showing that you can go through life by yourself. When in reality, you’re missing out on even more joy and you just haven’t found the right person for yourself.
Here’s the thing, everything in life is meant to be shared.
If you watch a good movie, what do you want to do? You want to share it with someone else. If you had a great dining experience, you want to share that with people. Life is meant to be shared! That's where the juice of life is!
The final area of your relationship is your peer group. Your peer group greatly impacts your relationship with yourself, because if you're around people that talk crap about themselves on a regular basis or use self-deprecating humor, you will too. If you’re around people that speak highly of themselves and have confidence and are successful? You’ll show up in that way! Because when the people around you expect you to succeed, you will succeed. You will find a way.
Now, I want you to ask yourself, which area are you focused on the most right now? Then ask yourself, what area am I not doing well in and how is that impacting the area that you’re focusing the most on.
For example, if your physical health isn't doing well, how is that impacting your income? Your marriage? You can bet your butt that if your physical health is off, it’s impacting your marriage. You don’t have the energy for anything when your physical health is off!
What I have found in studying people is that there’s three core survival needs people have.
Survival Need 1: Certainty
Everyone needs certainty. The need to avoid pain and gain pleasure. The need to feel safe. But if you are missing certainty, life feels uncertain and then you don't take risks. You play life not to lose, instead of playing life to win. If it's prioritized first, you're going to close in on the world around you to feel a sense of control and you won't let your heart expand. That's what happens when you don't have certainty.
Survival Need 2: Love
Love is a biological need. It is not a want. It is a need. If you are not given physical love when you’re born, you’ll die. It's called failure to thrive. Losing love is the deepest fear we have. If you think about any sort of stress or fear of putting yourself out there, it all comes down to losing love.
Survival Need 3: Energy
Energy is a survival need. Without energy cells die—it's called aging! I'm not just talking about the willed energy to put yourself in a great state on a regular basis—that’s important and necessary too. But what I'm talking about is the energy to go through life vibrantly. That type of energy.
That’s what emotion is. Emotion is energy in motion! Let’s use excitement as an example. Is it a fast or slow emotion? It’s fast! It’s a high energy emotion. What about depression? It’s slow. The vibrations and wavelengths are opposite. And guess what? The vibes you put out attract your tribe. So, your energy needs to be maximized.
Why does this matter? Because all these areas impact each other!
Let me give you a quick rundown. If you have vibrant wealth and health, but are suffering in your relationships, what does that mean? You’re missing a survival need: love. If you have vibrant health and relationships, but are suffering in wealth? You’re missing the certainty survival need. If you have vibrant relationships and wealth, but are suffering in your health? You’re missing the energy survival need.
So which area are you overly focused on and why?
Maybe it's because you're escaping the area that you're unfulfilled in. And if you're being honest with yourself, maybe the reason why you're unfulfilled in one area is because you don't have the courage to face it right now.
Well, it’s time to deploy some courage.
Be courageous and face that area of your life. Transform it! It's an absolute must because when all three of these areas are maximized, that's where you have ultimate fulfillment and success.
If this makes sense conceptually, but you still don’t really know why you can’t focus on your physical health or why you have a bad relationship with your partner it could be because of your beliefs about success. It could be because of your unique success archetype.
If you understand your archetype, then you’ll be able to see the limiting beliefs that are preventing you from succeeding in those areas. If you haven’t taken it yet, you can do so now!
It’s a free, 60-second quiz: quizzes.bradbizjack.com
This quiz will show you your starting point, your limiting beliefs and how it can be hurting these different areas we've talked about today. As a bonus, you'll also be on the fast list to hear about when we have opportunities to provide coaching in each of these areas for you.
I hope you found tremendous value in this episode today. Always remember, you're only one insight away from a radically different life.
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